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New Carpet

Posted on April 17, 2012 by captaincreed

image

Captain’s Log. Daddy Chronicles. Diaper Date 1673.  The Captain is finding out that children expidite the rate of erosion of things.  Don’t let the labels fool you – it may say unbreakable, or stain resistor, or whatever, but children have an innate ability to corrupt or destroy and object you can think of. 
The Captain is getting new carpet today.  Looking at the battlefield of his living room the Captain can still hear all of the “oops” and “Daddy, I need a napkin” or “Hey ya’ll watch this!” (okay that one may be from the Captain’s friends) expressions that punctuated the illustrations of existence that outline the floor.  If one really examined there is probably a timeline that would appear – a hieroglyphics of Cheerios, crayons, juice, and foot soot indentations.
Suffice to say – our carpet tells a story.  And today a new chapter begins.  Hopefully, the author of this chapter doesn’t write as much, but with two kids, a dog, and three cats there is an adventure to be had every day.
The Captain wanted to grow indoor turf like a baseball field, but Mrs. Captain nixed that idea.  Or fake turf like a football field (with that weird rubber stuff) and paint the yardlines on the field – it would make the animal and kid interactions waaay more fun to watch (we could host the Puppy Bowl!).  Mrs. Captain threw a penalty flag on that idea.  He also suggested just laying down that filler stuff that you put on playgrounds (cheaper), but Mrs. Captain only rolled her eyes.  There is a reason that the Captain does not do interior design. 
And so the newest chapter begins today.  The Captain is formulating a defense of the new turf.  What do you do to protect your carpet? What products do you use for spills/stains (inevitable with 5 biped and quadpeded animals)?  The Captain wants to know.  Leave a comment below. 
For now…Captain out.

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  • carpet
  • children
  • Fatherhood
  • 2 thoughts on “New Carpet”

    1. Duane Gluck says:
      April 17, 2012 at 8:36 am

      Good morning Captain! I feel for your plight. We have carpet and several quadrapeds running around as well and at times the carpeted floors pay the the price for clumsiness. Age old words were spoken to me from a kind old man about cleaning the carpet “ya gotta use elbow grease!” I really don’t know where said grease comes from but it sounds kinda gross. Remember, it is a large universe out there and allies are abound! DS signing off..

      Reply
      1. poopdeckcapt says:
        April 17, 2012 at 11:44 pm

        With advice from the Dragon Slayer I can’t go wrong! Thanks!

        Reply

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